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martieko

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  • How to deal with 18 yo whose got everyone on edge?

    Our oldest daughter is almost 19 and graduated this spring from high school. After graduating she decided she didn't have to follow rules around the house, that we owed her a new car, and would sleep all day having a fit if her younger brother or sister woke her up. After another heated debate over it i told her if she didn't like the way it was here she was an adult and could leave. She left and now war has broke out. She has told all the family that I kicked her out and has moved in with her dad's brother and his wife and of course my husband's family all sides with her. Our younger son and daughter blame me for their sister leaving even though they are more content with her out of the house and the fighting stopped. My husband doesn't want anyone mad at him so he avoids everything and refuses to have an opinion. I love my daughter and she is a good kid but she is also a very spoiled kid and thinks it should all revolve around her when it doesn't. During the winter when it was cold or if it was raining she wouldn't even give her sister a ride to school even though she was going there as well and instead her sister had to walk in it. Her dad was always stupid for doing this or that and she never had a kind word for any of us unless she wanted something. now she refuses to come home because she has expectations here and has not spoke to me in 2 months she will however call her dad when she wants something because she knows he will give it to her. i do not like the relationship being this way but at the same time I am tired of the arguing and defiant attitude and being told what I owe her. Something has to be done though because it has got the other two kids upset and my marriage is suffering because we can't even talk about it without fighting. My husband and i got a divorce 7 years ago and then remarried 4 years ago and this daughter has never wanted us back together. She liked when we were apart because she was in charge at both houses while we were at work and once we remarried I quit work and she lost that power. How do you convince a kid you do love them and want whats best for them without letting them walk all over you

    5 AnswersAdolescent10 years ago
  • Fair curfew for prom night?

    Tomorrow is prom and my daughter is a sophomore but is going with her boyfriend. The transportation is taken care of as they are going wit a group of kids and all the parents chipped in to rent a limo. The prom is 20 miles from here at the college campus in a banquet room and will be over at 11pm, until that time no one is allowed to leave the prom once they get there as this has always been the schools policy. One of the other parents is hosting an after pom party and this is where I get concerned. I know I am over protective of my kids, but the limo will drop them off at this kids house and from then on they will be in their own car. My daughter asked to be allowed to go to the party and said they would be home by 1:30am. My husband and I can agree on her going to the party, we know the parents and know no drinking will be allowed etc the problem is we do not want her in a car that late because even though this group is not drinking others will and feel like it is an accident waiting to happen. I know prom is special so what would be a good cmpromise.

    9 AnswersParenting1 decade ago
  • Parents with high school kids please answer?

    My daughter is 16. Every year for as long as I can remember on the night before the baseball team has it's first home game the pep club and cheer leaders go and t-pee the players cars and write on the windows with that soap stuff, they also get the coaches cars as well. They do not use anything that could hurt the paint on the cars and it has always been done in fun. Well this year they did it and now all of the kids are being placed in iss at school because one of the coaches is the new principle and he didn't think it was funny. This is the same man though that will not alow boys to wear a ball cap anywhere on school property, banned i pods and video games on school busses and put a stop to spirit week at school during homecoming. I think it is a bit much and so do a lot of other paents. Not a single player or other coach was upset but this man was. The parents feel if he wants to punish them make them clean it up, give them detention something but not iss for a school tradition because that will go on their permanant record. Are we right or is he nd what would you do.

    7 AnswersParenting1 decade ago
  • summer camp after sexual abuse?

    My daughter is 11 and has went to girl scout cap for a week every summer for the last three years. Back in the fall she was molested by a family friend and since then her dad and I do not really trust anyone around the kids and seldom let them out of our sight. She does go to counseling and the court case will be over with next month. She is doing extremely well with all of it considering but her dad and I are not. Today the brochure for camp came in the mail and when she saw it of course she got all excited and started looking for which session she wanted to attend, her dad and I do not want her to go after all that has happened.

    If we let her go it will be a terrible week around here I can not imagine her being gone after what happened but if we don't let her go it is like we are punishing her for something someone else did. I know she loves camp but how can I let her go and should we let her go.

    8 AnswersParenting1 decade ago
  • Little league basketball coach upsetting kids?

    My daughter is 11 and plays on a basketball team, well did tonight was the last game. Tonight while we were at the game some of us parents noticed that two of the girls were not playing while all of the others were being rotated in and out. At one point my daughter came past me on her way to the locker room to use the restroom so I asked her why those two girls weren't playing and she said she didn't know but one of them was crying because he would not let her play. These kids are not the worse players on the team, in fact one that was playing is not only a mediocre player but she has no sportsmanship at all and even deliberately shoved a girl from the other team in the back when the girl went to make a shot then when she fell this kid actually stepped on her and this coach laughed. Anyway after the game I calmly, which was not easy to do, called him to the side and told him I thought he should apologize to the little girls he upset and he said why I let them play the last minute. Well I just shook my head and said that is sad and went to walk off when he threw a ball at me and started yelling that he took the team because none of the lazy parents would. Again I simply told him it was pretty sad that he thought bad sportsmanship and making a child cry was the way to go and started to walk away again. He kept yelling and cussing at me until a ref told him to leave.

    Ok maybe I shouldn't have said anything but to me it was wrong the way he treated those kids. If their parents had of been there I am sure there would have been more said than telling him he needed to apologize. As a parent if you saw this would you sit back and sy nothing because your child was playing or would you have defended the other kids.

    4 AnswersParenting1 decade ago
  • Boundaries for neighborhood kids?

    We live in a small town and pretty much everyone knows everyone. Our house is only about 1/4 mile from the school yet we are still out of town a bit. We have land on which we have horses and we also have a pool and trampoline for the kids to enjoy. Today I had to run an errand so when I picked the kids up from school we ran to the store etc. When we got home there was 7 kids there waiting on my kids to get home. 2 were on the trampoline and the rest were out at the fence aggravating the horses, they had also let our lab out of the kennel and he was running loose. First the oldest kid there was only 9, second no one was home and yet their parents seemed to think it was fine they play over here. Right now the pool is still covered for winter but in a few months it won't be and I do not need kids around when we are not home. These parents don't see anything wrong with it and say their kids just wanted to see the horses or jump on the trampoline all I see is kids unsupervised and around things that could get them hurt causing my husband and I to loose everything we have worked to get. I don't want to call the cops but it is getting to that point anyone have any other solutions. When I am home they can come over all they want but not when we are gone, even when my 16 year old is home I do not want kids around as it is not her place to watch them.

    4 AnswersParenting1 decade ago
  • I can not stand my daughter's new friend HELP?

    My daughter is a great kid and now I have always loved all of her friends and they are always at our house. A couple of months ago a new kid moved to town and has started hanging out with my daughter and the other kids. The girl is not a bad kid, she is well mannered and all of that but her voice drives me up the wall. She sounds like a miniature version of the nanny if you remember that show. Not to mention when the girls all go to practice their softball she sits and whines because the others threw the ball to hard or they hit it to far. My nerves are on edge when this kid comes around. I love the fact my kid accepts everyone and wants to make her feel welcome but how can I do it when I want to send the kid home as soon as she gets here. How would other mom deal with it. The ids ae all 11 and 12 so not like I have to watch them every second but I am helping the practice outside and whe inside I can HEAR her.

    17 AnswersParenting1 decade ago
  • taking custody of a family member?

    My niece is 23 and has two wonderful kids. She is still acting like a kid herself though and the entire family worries about the kids. He son was already taken away from her once when he ended up out in the parking lot of her apartment complex alone in the rain while she was inside asleep. She eventually got custody of him back and since then had her daughter. I keep the baby, she is 6 months, every weekend and her son goes to his dads on the weekend. Every time she brings the baby up the baby is dirty, no clothes, bottles etc. I had finally wnt out and bought everything she would need and kept it here but this weekend when she brought her up she had a burn on her face from where her mom dropped a cigarette on her, her neck was so chapped it was raw and she was obviously sick. She is suppose to go home this afternoon and I do not feel like I can send her home. My husband agrees with me but I am afraid if I call cps then they will put her in a foster home and none of us will be able to see her. The father is ot in the picture at all nor is his family and as far as my nieces mother well that would be more of the same. I know I can not let her go back home and I a taking the baby to the doctor in a few hours and having him check her out and help me make the call. What I need to know is what are the chances of them letting her stay with my family. I do not work and stay at home, my husband owns his own company so we are ok finacially to provide and we have the room. We did have temporary custody of my nephews for a few months while their parents gt their life straight. Should I callthe family attorney before we go to the doctor or what.

    8 AnswersParenting1 decade ago
  • Daughter and prom dress?

    My daughter is in 10th grade and is going to the prom with her boyfriend who is a senior this year. We have been shopping for te perfect dress and yesterday she found one she fell in love with but it had a price tag of almost $600. I said no. I can not see spending that kind of money on a dress she will wear one time and then shove it in the back of the closet. My husband on the other hand says if it is the one she wants then get it for her that proms are special. Am I being mean or what. Would other mom's spend that kind of money on a prom dress?

    12 AnswersParenting1 decade ago
  • Question about child's friends mother?

    Last year my 10 year old daughter was molested by her best friends grandpa. That was hard enough for all of us to deal with as it was several kids involved including his granddaughter. Now we found out that he had a prior conviction in 1981 ( didn't have to register because it was before the Megan Law started) and the friends mom knew all about t, knew he was convicted and had served time and yet she never bothered to tell any of her daughter's friends wh would be around the man. I blame her just as much as I do her step-father now. No she didn't molest my child he did but had she told us the truth he never would have been around my daughter in the first place. Am I wrong for feeling this way. I can't stand to be around her anymore. She knowingly put her daughters in danger as well as mine and the result was they were all molested and hers were actually raped. I fell for her kids for what they went through but I can't muster up any sympathy for this women when she knew what the man was capable of. Now my daughter's life has changed, instead of being a child she had to grow up to fast. She see a counselor who specializes in sexual abuse and is doing well but I am not. I am so mad and then I feel guilty for getting mad.

    9 AnswersParenting1 decade ago
  • Nice way to tell another mother to shut up?

    My daughter has a friend in her 5th grade class that she loves spending time with and I have to admit the kid is a really sweet little girl but I want to smack her mother.

    My husband owns his own company and we make a very good living. He works very hard to provide a nice life for the kids and me and I have always been a stay at home mom. It never fails when this mom comes to pick up her daughter she makes sarcastic comments on it must be nice to sit home all day, wish I could afford designer clothes for my kids, gee what did you rob to get that car. It drives me nuts.

    We have never put money above people and accept everyone for who they are and so do our kids. We tell them that they are the same as all other kids poor because the kids don't have anything the parents do. How can I politely tell this woman to get over it.

    20 AnswersParenting1 decade ago
  • Loudmouth parents?

    My daughter is playing softball again this summer and I love going to watch the games but this year she has one girl on her team whose mother doesnt know when to shut up. She is constantly belittling her child from the bleachers if she misses a ball or strikes out, yelling so loud when the kid is in the outfield we can't hear anything else and curses the umpire for making "stupid" calls. No one is enjoying the games anymore and I feel sorry for her kid. All the other parents just want to tell her to shut up and actually the coach has but she says it is her kid and she has to motivate her. This isnt motivation it is cruel. How can we get her to lay off so we can all enjoy the game. Or does anyone know if you can ban someone from a public park?

    11 AnswersGrade-Schooler1 decade ago