Jay S

We all know why the star is on top of a Christmas tree... but why is there an angel?

One Christmas Eve, Santa was in his workshop making his list, checking it twice, blah blah blah... and he was a little upset. It was Christmas Eve and he should have had this done by now. Suddenly, there was a knock on the door. It was the Head Stable Elf.

"Santa! The reindeer are all sick and Blitzen has the runs real bad! You can't take them out tonight!"

Now Santa is a little more upset. There's no flights around the world in 24 hours including timezone changes.

Then there's another knock. Head Worker Elf.

"Santa! We are going on strike! We want better hours and longer breaks!"

Now he's anxious. Who's going to make the toys? He's not done with his list yet so you KNOW not all the toys are made. Then his wife comes in-

"Santa, I want you to stick to your diet. Last time you had so much milk and cookies that it was April before you lost that weight."

Now Santa is extremely upset. That is the best part of his job. Santa starts muttering and cursing when there's a knock on the door.

It's an angel with a Christmas tree.

"Hi Santa! Where do you want me to put this?"

"You can take that tree and shove it up your-"

And that is the reason why there's an angel on top of the tree.

Given the state of the economy today, what is the quickest way to make a small fortune?

Start with a large one.

On that note, I tried to use my debit card at the ATM machine last night. It gave me the error message "Insufficient Funds"

I don't know if it means me or the bank.

An old man is sitting on his porch when a little boy walks by carrying a load of duct tape. The old man stops him.

"Hold up Boy! What cha doin'?"

"I'm gonna catch some ducks!"

"You can't catch ducks with that!"

At the end of the day, the little boy walks back home with a bunch of ducks trailing behind him.

The next day the boy walks past with his arms full of chicken wire.

"Hold up Boy! What cha doin'?"

"I'm gonna catch me some chickens!"

"You can't catch chickens with that!"

Sure enough, at the end of the day, the boys walking home with a bunch of chickens trailing behind him.

The next day the little boy walks by with his arms full of pussywillow.

"Hold up Boy! Let me get my Jacket!"

What animal is the Canary Islands name derived from?

Their are three erorrs with this sentence. What are they?

If you are supposed to star an interesting question and someone asks the ever so interesting "Will you star this question?" Do you give them a star just to make them feel better or do you write it off as 10 seconds of your life wasted?

Ok, why is it that every single day someone asks,"Which came first the chicken or the egg?" or The Missing Dollar Riddle? How hard is it to do a search for the question?

Here's a clue: Dinosaurs laid eggs long before there were chickens. So the egg came first.

There is no missing dollar. The way that you phrase the question "creates" one. It still adds up to $30 or $100 or whatever amount you started with.

I know this won't do any good, I'll still see these two questions tomorrow... heck someone will probably read this and think it'll be hilarious to ask them as soon as they are done. (By the way: it's not)

Sorry... just had to vent.

Thanks, and enjoy the rest of your day.

We all know the song "Jingle Bells." In the song they mention a horse. What's the horse's name?

OK... first a little background. My family used to get together and tell jokes on our holidays. My Grandfather had trouble remembering the jokes he heard through the year so he kept an index card with the punchlines on them so he would read the punchline and that would remind him of the joke and then he would tell it to us.

When he passed away we were going through his stuff and we found one of his index cards. Between the 6 of us we would read the punchline and one of us would know it and tell it to everyone else. Unfortunately, one of the punchlines no one recognizes. So if you know this joke could you answer this for us?

The punchline is, "I don't know but the streaker needs ironing!"

Thank you much.

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