Heather

I’ve recently started seeing this guy, we were drinking with his friend and he’s dominant (quite new to it) and him and his friend would gang up on me and insult me as a joke which is fine, although towards the end of the night it got a bit much! Anyway, every time I insulted him back, he would pull my head back by my hair and ask me to repeat what I said, or he’d choke me right in front of his friend.... does anyone know why he did this? This was meant to be a private thing, not on display for his friend to see. It’s disrespectful right? 

I’ve noticed a guy I’m recently seeing, acts different in front of his friends (cocky yeah fair enough it’s a common theme) but I’ve noticed he mentions private things about me randomly when we’re with them, he also touches me inappropriately in front of them when he knows I don’t like it... I’ve noticed he never really takes my side on anything, even if it’s just banter he’ll always back his best friend up! Does he seek too much approval from his friends? Is it a lack of respect for me? Or does he want my self esteem to be as low as his is? Please give me an analysis I’d like to try and understand! 

So I got my bf to be open and honest with me about how he feels, he ended up admitting he’s bored of me (we’ve been together 3 years) and he thinks about what it would be like to be with other women! To add some context, I’m his first and only gf so I can understand his curiosity! However, we’ve broken up before, he played the field and we ended up back together anyway! I want to do what’s best for both of us and obviously this is very hurtful! Is this behaviour normal after 3 years? Or should I consider leaving him? Any advice is greatly appreciated.