Caroline

I'm a 21 year old female(technically a woman but I don't feel like an adult).

Ever since the age at around 7 I have struggled with anxiety, this outed in not being able to speak/speak up/ask questions not only to strangers but also to family members and even my own parents.

When I was in kindergarten and high school I got bullied a lot because of my size (I'm about 5'1) and I had glasses(I got lasek when I was 18). Because of that I have trouble making new friends with my classmates and I rather be on my own.(I'm in college now btw) I also (think) have ednos, I have never been actually diagnosed though but I'm pretty sure.

So anyway to come to the question part of this question. I have been using Ritalin 10mg about three times a day for about 4 months now (I struggle to concentrate without taking them a lot), but sometimes when I take I get a sort of nervous feeling and when the effects wears of I get increasingly depressed(empty feeling/lonely/awful/nothing it worth anything). I can't go to the doctor because the Ritalin aren't really prescribed to me(I know very stupid to take medicine that aren't described to you but the person I get them from is a dr himself and he thinks this is what I should take for my concentration problem, he doesn't know I may have an ed/anxiety/depression).

So, what should I do, I know you guys aren't experts but I can't afford a dr (psychologist). I probably should stop taking the Ritalin and go to a dr that can help me.. please help