A possibly bandwagon fan needs guidance...?

At the risk of getting really slammed, I am going to admit that I may be a bit of a bandwagon fan. I am not very proud of it, but I feel I have valid reasons to like the teams I do. I guess I need a little prospective on this issue.

First off, as a kid I didn't really like sports at all, and I didn't have a relative that pushed a team on me. When I got older, I started liking sports more. My best friends as a kid were both born in Baltimore, and I watched games with them, so they became a major influence. When I was about 17, I finally decided to follow Baltimore, one, because of my friends' influence, and two, they were the closest team to my home, and they grew on me over time as I grew into liking sports in general.

Starting in about 1999, I did start liking the Red Sox, but I still liked the O's more. I think I was beginning to like the entire sport more, and I appreciated more teams. But I started traveling to Boston frequently for the first time around the same time the Boston Red Sox began their success in the 00's (and when the O's really sucked). I became enamored by their leadership style, their stadium, and their fans. I was also falling in love with the city of Boston as well.

At the same time, my frustration with the O's was at its peak. I was feeling myself drifting away from the O's. And then the last couple seasons, I have pretty much flipped to liking the Red Sox more. Even still, I have not gone to see the Sox play in Baltimore since because, one, I don't like out of town fans out numbering home fans as a rule (and I didn't want to contribute), and two, unless you're a kid, it's not very cool to wear the colors of both teams.

I also felt some justification when I learned those friends from childhood from Baltimore had also changed their loyalty to the Red Sox. Perhaps the fact they now live in New England was a major factor, and gives their switch a little more justification than mine. But I remember them being very big O's fans and cheering them on in the '83 World Series. So the people who clued me into the O's in the first place had also switched their loyalty.

But then I saw this last series between the two that left the Red Sox out of the playoffs. I wanted the Red Sox to win, and was disappointed that they lost. But I couldn't help but feel joy for the Orioles who played pretty darn well.

So now I am conflicted. I DON'T want to be a bandwagon fan, but I really love both of these teams. I feel I have to split my loyalty to find some peace with this, but I don't know if I really want to do that. And I don't know if I'll be taken seriously as a fan.

When it really comes down to it, I am a fan of the sport first and foremost. I gravitated to Baltimore primarily because of geography and childhood friends. Then as I matured as a person, I realized I appreciated a better run team like Boston more than simply the team closer to where I live.

The thing is, I feel stuck. I can be accused of giving up on Baltimore, and I would accept there is truth to that. I just got tired of the loosing. It stops being fun. But I still want to see them win. If the situation this week was reversed, would I have cheered on Baltimore over Boston? I think I have to say it is likely.

Bottom line -- I love both teams, and I want to love both teams, but how do I do that and still keep some credibility as a fan? Maybe I just have to do what works for me, and forget other people's opinions (which I do most of the time anyway). I welcome THOUGHTFUL and INSIGHTFUL comments.