Yahoo Answers is shutting down on 4 May 2021 (Eastern Time) and the Yahoo Answers website is now in read-only mode. There will be no changes to other Yahoo properties or services, or your Yahoo account. You can find more information about the Yahoo Answers shutdown and how to download your data on this help page.

Zac asked in Family & RelationshipsFriends · 6 years ago

How do you pursue deep friendships? How do I tell someone I really appreciate them?

I'm friendly, a goof, and have had many friends, but in terms of having a really good friend to talk to, I can't name anyone in my life who has played that roll. It might be because I'm shy, scared of embarrassing myself, or scared of trying and being hurt. I know is that I'm tired of playing relationships safe, because the more shallow they seem, the more lonely I feel. This reflection has made me realize I don't really know how to make close friends. I've tried just being myself, but I tend to coast and not be very intentional.

I started interning with another guy two months ago. We have a lot in common (same major, beliefs, movie tastes, personalities, etc.) , have hung out a quite bit and pranked the office together. We get along pretty well. I'm think they're super fun to be around, and he is totally someone I could see myself being really good friends with in the future. However, I am a poor conversationalist, and don’t know if he also want sot be friends or he’s just being polite.

We both work at a university, and are going back to School in September. We might see each other around, but I fear that when we get really busy, and stop hanging out. As a result, I feel like I should take a risk to try and deepen the friendship or see if he even wants to be good friends. I’ve thought of just telling him how I feel about it, but is it weird just to tell a friend how much you appreciate them? How would you do that? Should I think of something else?

-An Awko Taco

2 Answers

Relevance
  • Anonymous
    6 years ago

    I wish I had a great answer for you but I wanted to say I feel the same way and have dealt with this same struggle. Most guy friends I've made were through roommate, school, or work situations. As much as I think it is OK and great to tell a friend how much you appreciate them, I can't advise you to do that because many guys would find it weird. It depends if he's a macho/manly guy, or if he's the opposite. Still I advise against it. Guys generally aren't open with their feelings like that unless it's some extreme situation where it makes complete sense.

    I think a better move would be to ask him if he wanted to get drinks or go to some activity. Also I would connect with him via email and/or social sites.

  • 6 years ago

    I think writing him how you feel is the best way forward you should start with do you want to hang out soon because I would really want to be closer friends then hopefully he will get back to you and just stray talking now about yourself then he will talk about yourself and then you will be comfortable with him enough that you won't need to worry about being shy

Still have questions? Get answers by asking now.