Stargazer Lily

My grandparents have seem to be ignoring me. Since Christmas, they have not answered a single phone call, face time, text message, email, or Facebook Message from me... I got engaged a few months ago and they haven't even acknowledged that... So my fiance and I booked our venue and I've been debating about writing a hand written letter to my grandparents explaining about how hurt I am about the fact that they don't seem to want to talk to me and that with my wedding coming up, that they should not expect an invite due to this behavior... There is also this part of me that tells me to not bother sending them anything... which would also end up including not inviting my aunt who lives with them. (and I would like to invite her because she absolutely adores my fiance) So, do I send an invite addressed to only my aunt and hope that she doesn't side swipe me with bringing my grandparents or do I just scratch all of them from the guest list.... or do I just write this letter and get it over with?

So ever since Christmas, my grandparents seem to be ignoring me. Everything was fine when I had seen them in October. I spoke with them on Thanksgiving but when I tried to call them on Christmas, they both ignored my calls and text messages, and I tried again on New Year's Eve and they again didn't answer. I see my grandfather responding to my cousins and siblings on Facebook, but I can't even get them to email me or call me back. I'm not the type of grandchild that only contacts them when I need something, so I don't believe that I am being ignored for that reason. I did get into a fight with my cousin on Facebook when he swore that a post I wrote was written directly to him and it wasn't. So maybe it's that. I am deeply hurt by this and I have explained that in my emails to them. Should I give up? They're the only living grandparents I have.

I recently worked for an Adult Living Facility and was let go right before the holidays. I had originally planned to give cards to the residents, and have them already written out.. so I was wondering if I should still send them or completely scratch the idea. I'm not putting a return address because I know the mail is sorted by the person who terminated me... but I really do want these cards to go to these people because I know they're alone on the holidays.

I take my Birth Control pill pretty regularly... usually between 8 and 10 am... commonly 8am.... yesterday I forgot and didn't take it until about 10 at night... my boyfriend and I ended up having sex and he didn't pull out and didn't use a condom (we were caught up in the moment and thought nothing of it since I take birth control... normally we're cautious and usually do use condoms regardless of being on the pill.) I've been on this brand for going on its 2nd month and today started the 2nd week of this pack, should I still get the morning after pill or no?

Plus the pill I take is a "combination pill" so from what I've read in the packet, I technically don't ovulate.

Also since most pharmacies are closed for the holiday, I know there's a 72 hour window even though the best time to take it as a soon as possible.

Please just give me an honest answer and don't rip my head off for a moment of lack of judgment.

My grandmother did not have a will when she passed away. My aunt is getting my grandparent's marriage certificate, but when she passes away, I do want it back. How would I type this as an agreement between both her and I that I would get it back. I only want it in writing because of the fact that too many times I have seen people get things they don't deserve from deceased relatives mostly because there was no will or there was no word that the person agreeded that the other person would get it. Any help is greatly appreciated. Also, knowing my family, I would need this agreement to be something that would stand up in court because these are the type of relatives who would take it to that level.

Long story short, last month my period was longer than usual it lasted 9 days instead of the normal 5-6. I missed 3 days worth of pills and got my period again, this time for 9 days. I continued the pack as told and went to my Gyno as soon as possible. She did tests and 1 was a pregnancy test which came back negative. I had spotting the week of when my period was supposed to come. Now I've had intense cramping but no period even though it constantly feels like I have it. Is it possible my cycle might skip this month because of the 2 heavy periods last month? She's sending me for blood work but the weather was so bad here that I haven't gotten to get the blood work done. It was around this time last month that I got my period the 2nd time. Should I wait? Should I call my gyno? I'm deff not pregnant. Several tests have confirmed that.

So for my friend's birthday I bought her an Alex & Ani bracelet (we've been friends since we were 5 and 7) I don't know which part of the bracelet I should give her.... The best or the friends part... do I let her decide? Do I keep the best and give her the friends cause I'm gifting it to her?

I'm getting a tattoo in memory of my grandma. It's going to be her signature. I don't know if I should get it to face towards me or face outwards. Should I talk with the tattoo artist or play around with a copy of the signature and figure out which way I like best.

A while back I noticed that every now and then my right pointer finger knuckle would swell and it would become very sensitive. Eventually it reached a point where I can't bend my finger back, and I can't make a fist.

I've been tested for RA and several other things, went for an MRI and went for X-rays, I've been given Nabumetone 500mg and was recently uped to 750mg because the pain and swelling is so intense. It hasn't done anything, I get no relief at all. I was told it could be tendinitis but the symptoms don't match.

I ice my hand and I use a heating pad but there is no relief. I've wrapped my had and end up having to take the bandage of because the swelling becomes so intense that it hurts.

If I catch the side of my pointer finger in the slightest wrong way, I get a sharp pain but it usually goes away.

This is the first time I have ever experienced a pain this intense and sometimes it either takes over the whole hand or just stays between my pointer and middle finger, but my pointer finger is completely swollen. I have a slight bump between the two that sends sharp pain as soon as it is touched and I nearly jumped out of the chair in the drs office when he pressed on the knuckle of my pointer finger.

I get some temporary relief if I run my hand under cold water but that's about it. The antiinflamitories and OTC pain meds don't even slightly dull the pain.

Sometimes my pointer finger swells up to the point that my nail slightly turns purple.

I'm also noticing a pain that's been traveling up my arm.

Has anybody else experienced this and if you have, what were you diagnosed with? How long was it before drs figured out what it was? Is there a way I can stop this.

Please serious answers only.

Seriously, can somebody please explain why Loyalty and Honesty brings more trouble then good?

I've always been a loyal and honest person with my friends, I'm starting to believe that nobody likes that in a person anymore because out of no where people end up no longer being friends with me.

Or am I just a huge f*** up because I have a habit of telling people what other people have said about them. I also own up to whatever it is I've said.

I hate confrontation and I'd rather be honest then hold stuff in until my anger gets the best of me.

I've been on birth control for about three years. I've pretty much always on point. I usually take it at around the same time every day, or I take it every day. Well I accidentally missed two pills (thinking I had taken them when I took other medications) anyways, yesterday I took the pill for that day, plus the two I missed. This morning my boyfriend and I had spontaneous moment before he left for work. He used a condom (I never let him not) and I took my pill for today as I usually do, but when I went to mark it on my calendar I noticed that today is my ovulation day. My question is, should I get the morning after pill anyways? I know I have a window of opportunity before its useless. I left a message with my GYN to call me back, but she might not be in her office today because she's also an obstetrician as well. Please let me know. I would really appreciate it.

My mom is one of 4 kids, my grandma is 91 years old and I have 4 cousins. Three older and one just 18 months younger than me. For as long as I can remember, I have been at the center of every fight my mom has gotten into with her siblings and their spouses.

My family had expected me to be some wild child trouble maker and I actually turned out to be a good kid.

Due to my parents divorce and the request of my deceased grandfather, when I was about 2 and a half, my mom and I moved in with my aunt and grandparents, and we have been living here since then. (I'm 23)

Growing up, my cousins always felt that I always got more than they did, and my mom's brother in law and sister in law always felt that my mom was living the free life. Because we do a lot with my aunt and grandma, such as vacations and other things like that. But it's not, both my mom and I are in debt to my aunt because she has loaned us money for various things such as car repairs, medical bills, regular bills and so forth. Even though my mom and I don't pay rent, we contribute to the house in other ways, such as doing the food shopping and other things needed in the house.

Growing up, my grandma was my care-taker, she made my lunch in the morning, got me up and ready for school, took me to the bus, and would pick me up after school, and would help me with my homework. Then when I started college, my grandma gave up driving so that I could use her car for school and for work, which lead to me becoming her care taker, and I have never complained about it. My grandma makes all her appointments around my school and work schedule, and because of that, I know everything that's going on with her health wise.

This past June, my grandma had a health scare, and hasn't been the same since. I even took this semester off from school to take of her, because we have been having a hard time getting the approval for aids to be home with her.

Recently my aunts and uncles have suddenly shown some great concern, but not in any way that is helpful to me or my aunt and mom. Both my mom and aunt feel that it's my aunt and uncle's mom too and they should help out, but both my aunt and uncle have very controlling spouses who need to have a say as well. My cousins are no help because they don't even pick up a phone to call her, and in my younger cousin's case (she's 22) will argue with her mom about how it cuts into whatever plans she has.

I don't complain about having to take care of my grandma and I don't ask for help from any of my cousins nor my aunts and uncles because I know they're not going to help unless they expect something in return.

My friends are actually more helpful then my own relatives. Anyways, there was a "family meeting" and I wasn't there because I had to work, but it was supposed to be concerning my grandma, and my mom ended up walking out saying that they can't call it a family meeting because I wasn't there.

There's so much I need to say to everybody, but at this point, I see its not even worth it. In fact, I actually don't even want to be in the same room as these people.

For some reason, I always felt like you need to be loyal to your family, because in the end they're all you have. At this point, I have zero loyalty to them, and I'm sick of being the better person in many situations.

So I was just wondering, is it okay to feel this way about them?

It might seem funny, but I have actually written a letter to Dr. Phil, but I never actually sent it because I don't even think he could help us, and I know the act that everybody would put on.

I know that when may grandma goes, my mom will have no relationship with her siblings except for her sister that she lives with.

So again, if its not hurting anybody, is it okay to have this burning hate towards

my cousin ( who makes everything a competition and swears that I am jealous of her),

hate my aunt ( her mom who created and continues to add fuel to the fire of problems between my cousin and I)

lack in any respect to my uncle who's wife has him by the balls to the point that I can't even have a relationship with him (she swears that I try to use him as a father figure, since my dad is dead, and wasn't really there to being with)

zero respect for my two cousins who live right over the bridge and can't even pick up a phone to call my grandma, nor bring her to see her great grand children.

Think my aunt and uncle are a bunch of jokes who can't even face me, because they know they're ****** up?

There are really only two people who have been hurt in all this because my relatives don't like my mom, and me, and that's just my aunt and grandma who I live with. And that's what bothers me more than anything.

For as long as I can remember I was never able to keep my room clean and I have always had a hard time parting with things such as clothes and papers. I dont know why but i'm afraid that if I get rid of it I'm going to need it and I won't be able to get it.

My friends have tried helping me, so has my boyfriend and even various family members have helped. Its always been useless. I can spend hours on end cleaning my room and within a week my room looks like its been blown up again.

My mom always said since it was useless, just keep a path to my bed just in case there is an emergency ans I need to get out. Anyways, my mom has been really getting on my case about cleaning my room and so has my boyfriend. I truely believe that I need help from somebody who is a professional because everybody jokes around that I'm a hoarder and I'm starting to feel like they're right.

I can't keep my room clean, but when it comes to my school notes and organization outside of my room, I freak out if I clean and it gets messy. But in my room its.the total opposite.

My mom is starting to think my room is making me sick because there is a lot of dust and dog dander in my room.

Various times that I've made the attempt to clean my room I spent 2 months sleeping on my couch (cause I piled called my clothes.on my bed) and then 5 months sleeping on an aerobed on the floor in my room cause my aunt was sick of me sleeping on our couch.

When I tell my mom that I think we need a professional to help me, she flips out and calls me lazy and says I always have an excuse.

Personally I really would like.to get a professional in to help me because they're used to dealing with this. How do I convince my mom that it would be helpful to everybody in the house?

Also if I can't bring anybody in to help me is there anyway I can convince myself to stick to my guns of 'dont need it, get rid of it'

How can I get over this and get my room clean and organized without getting overwhelemed?

Sorry to bother you but...

My boyfriend's brother invited me to his yellow ribbon ceremony because I couldn't make it to his bootcamp graduation. Ive been trying to find out what is the correct attire to wear to this because he told us it was formal, but when I look it up, a lot of people are dressed casual. Like school graduation casual. I don't want to be over dressed and I don't want to be under dressed, but I know my boyfriend's family has a tendency to dress over the top for no reason. I picked out black dress pants with a black and white dress tank and I have a light sweater to wear over the tank top (Its inside) and a pair of heels (flats just incase). Would that be okay? Ive never been to one before and I don't know anybody who has been to one of these. If you have been to one please help me out. Also, We're from New York so I don't know if that makes a difference because most of the videos I watched were from places like Oklahoma and New Mexico and Pennsylvania and a lot of them were dressed as if they were going to a High School Graduation. Any help would be greatly appreciated.

Today while at work an older gentleman came to my register with his wife and he was wearing a tank top exposing a tattoo on his left shoulder. Having recently getting one on my foot in memory of my dad since he would have been 50 this year, I was staring at the artwork when I realized, my father had the exact same tattoo in the exact same spot. I believe in Spirits and I believe in the Paranormal, but was my dad trying to contact me or was it just some random coincidence. I was also recently talking with my grandmother about wanting to see a Medium to get closure while she suggested I see a Psychic because she feels I need some guidance because in her eyes I'm very undecided in life.

My cousin and I are about 18 months apart. My aunt has always worked very hard at keeping us from being close. We never had the same group of friends and everything was always a competition and everything was always that I was picking on my cousin. I was the bully. The only time things had to be the same between us was during the holidays, our relatives had to buy us the exact same item it would just be a different color. Then there was a falling out in the family and we went several years without talking, until I decided to be the bigger person and tried to reconnect with my cousin. Now I sort of regret that. Anyways, anything I have ever done, my cousin has always had to do or some how attempt to do something better than me, like there is this ever present competition between us. and truth be told, I am so over it.

Here are just a few of the things that have happened

I had a sweet 16, she had a sweet 16.

I put vampire red in my hair, she put purple in her hair.

I held my graduation party at a local family restaurant, following year, hers was there.

I got a tattoo, she got one

I got a second, she got a second

I got a third, she got a third (and did it the day before my birthday so she could be the center of attention on MY BIRTHDAY)

I started dying my hair, she started to highlight her hair.

See what I'm talking about?

I just got a fourth tattoo, does that mean she's going to run out and get a fourth?

Anyways, I've tried very hard to try to be friends with her and either she doesn't know how, or she's just so set in her ways she thinks that I have other motives. Yet she always knows how to talk to me when she has nobody else.

I've tried to make plans with her, majority of the time she bails on me because her friends have better plans so, I just gave up and stopped making plans with her.

Anyways, last week, my cousin upgraded to the iPhone, and yesterday I upgraded to the Droid Razr, well when she found out, she freaked the hell out and told my mother that I was jealous of her and that I am always trying to out do her or some **** like that, I wasn't there because I have a job (finally something she doesn't have that I do have...sorry for the pettiness, but that is one thing I take huge pride in over her.)

Anyways, my aunt chimed in, as she always does when my cousin and I argue. She is a grown woman, my aunt needs to stay the hell out of it, so when my mother told my aunt to do that and told my cousin to take it up with me, my cousin turned around and told her that she can't talk to me because I yell and I scream and I don't act like a lady (man I wish you could see the way she gets when she's fired up and she has nerve to talk about me?) also, her and my aunt said I always have a puss on my face. Maybe I do, maybe I don't but majority of the time they come over with no warning and I am always in the middle of something or I'm always resting before I'm about to go off to work or class, depending on the day, sometimes even both. Anyways if my cousin knew anything, she would know that everything is how you approach me, if you're going to come at me with a nasty attitude I dish it back, you play nice, I play nice, that's just how I am and that's how I became because of stupid **** like this.

Another thing is, when I've needed her help with our grandmother, on several different occasions because of my work and school schedule, I caught her in several different lies. All telling me that she couldn't after I asked her if she was free and she said yes, when she would find out what it is, she would just turn around and say she had plans.

The best had to have been when she BORROWED a book from me and GAVE it to somebody else, and when I wanted it back to sell it, she suddenly couldn't get in touch with this girl who she gave it to and when I told her I wanted the money that I would have gotten for the book, she went and bought me the book to resell because "she didn't want me to hold it over her head"... I still have that ******* book because I can't sell it.

Anyways, I feel like I should say something to her because this has gotten out of hand, but everybody is just telling me to be the bigger person like I always am and just take her copying me as a form of flattery. But I really do want to say something because this has got to stop. I'm completely drained of this nonsense, that I never started but have always been the blame of.

So after taking the time to read all of this, is there any way I can approach this, or do I leave it alone and take the high road like my mother and other aunt want me to do. Truth be told, I have been up all night trying to figure out what I should do.

My boyfriend gave me a chinese evil eye/ good luck bracelet shortly before my birthday and I started to notice little cracks in the glass beads a while ago. Then today I got into a fight with my aunt nd I got really mad and threw my boot and I ended up breaking a glass and the bracelet completely snapped off my wrist. Is it a sign, or did he just give me an inexpensive bracelet. Also, I almost never take it off and I always wore it on my right wrist unless I had my watch on then I wore it on my left, I also kept it on while I would shower. So did it just break cause the elastic gave way or did it break from all the negative energy? I'm sort of superstitious so I'm curious what it means. As far as I know, nothing got caught on it, but I was in a blind rage when I threw my boot. Also now my boyfriend is mad that it broke.

Is this from all the negative energy or is this just some bad luck?

My mom overheard a conversation with my boyfriend, and now she hates him and wants me to dump him. He was drunk and made and empty threat that she's completely taken out of context. I talked to my boyfriend about what happened, he apologized, but I made him aware that this wasn't okay and that he needs help and to do something about it and he's considering it because he's beginning to see it for himself. The problem is, she's been fighting with me non stop and i'm really tired of it. I'm also not ready to end it with my boyfriend, because its not something that I chose to do, but something my mom is shoving down my throat. She say's that he's controling me and that I'm not thinking for myself, but if I do what she wants isn't it the same thing? I really need someone to help me out my other friends also think my mom is blowing it way out of proportion and that she needs to step back and trust me enough that I will make the right decision for myself. Whether its to be with him, or be with someone else when I'm ready. Some of my friends feel like my mother has never trusted any of my decisions and has never believed that I can think for myself. They all love my mom and knows that she loves me and wants what's best for me, but they think that she has very little faith in anything I do and that if I say something that goes against her, that its not me thinking for myself that its someone telling me what to think and say. HELP ME PLASE!

Something happened with my boyfriend's family and somehow I'm the one getting the blame that it was something I said, when I never said anything because it was none of my business to say anything. My boyfriend is giving me until he gets home from work tomorrow to figure out everything. The truth is, I don't know whats going on and everyone has their own story. I tried to make him understand that but he just wasn't listening. I love him and I have been though a lot of **** with him, and I know he has a lot of trust issues, so knowing that why would I betray him? The situation at hand is nothing of my business to be talking about to anybody, and I never spoke to anybody about it so I really do not understand how I even came about in the situation. I'm friends with everybody in the family, his mom, his brothers and their spouses and his sisters. I never talked to any of them about what I'm being accused of saying. I really want to just let the whole thing go, since he had a really crappy day and is in a **** mood and has been drinking pretty much all day, but he won't let it go until he knows the truth. I feel like the only way to clear my name would be if everyone else said that I had nothing to do with it, but it's almost like nobody wants to make it known that I had nothing to do with what is going on and that I don't even know how I got brought into it because the person who they're saying that said I said something I don't even talk to on a regular basis.

So what do I do? Should I let it go and let everyone else clear my name? Or should I just let him sober up and calm down and let him get his facts straight.

I don't know what to do, I just don't understand how I'm getting the blame when I never said anything.

So via Facebook, I found out that there was a Christmas Party from my job, and I didn't find out until everyone from work started posting about how they had a good time and everybody will have a hangover at work. Well I never got the invite, if anybody asks me, I was thinking of responding with the most sarcastic nice voice that I wasn't invited and that's why I wasn't there. But then I feel that is too childish and although I do work with a lot of people who are childish, it won't get me anywhere. So what should I do? Smile to these peoples faces and show them that it never got to me, or make it known that it pissed me off that I wasn't told about this let alone invited. I have work tomorrow night and I'll be the first to admit that I can be a little bit of a hot head when it comes to being left out or not invited to things. Maybe because I'm so mad right now and can't sleep that this is why I feel this way. Anyways, I really would appreciate it if I could get a decent mature answer. I really do want to know how to handle this the best way possible because I'm starting to think that the people I work with just smile to my face and talk **** about me when I'm not around.